Sometimes when I should be working, I like to look at blogs! Not all the time, I promise! Anyway, guilt aside, I like to check out Modestly Yours every couple weeks or so. I love Wendy Shalit's writing and she is very funny. I enjoy the ironic tone to many of her posts. I came across a magazine that she mentions called Eliza. You know this caught my attention as I love fashion and all things girlie!
This is just a brief blurb from the Eliza's website:
ELIZA Magazine is created for women who want to be stylish, sexy, and engaged in the world while retaining high standards in dress, entertainment, and lifestyle. In a media culture that frequently objectifies and commercializes women and their bodies, ELIZA strives to provide an alternative to the current mainstream media that emphasizes sex and skin in order to push products or sell magazines.
I didn't have very high expectations for the website, but I was happy to see that it is awesome and very well done. I put in my subscription for the magazine itself, so I will see how it turns out. I have been thinking more and more about modestly lately. It can be such a constant battle to be modest, because there really is a sense of accomplishment felt when I am admired by men. I guess that test is whether they are admiring me, or my cleavage! Darn genes. :)
- Side Note: I was actually in a wedding a couple of years ago that my parents were also at. I had to warn my father before hand not to attempt to rise up out of his seat during the ceremony to cover me up, as our dresses were seriously risque! My dad thought it was funny until he saw the dress. I told my sister that I felt like I was channeling Pamela Anderson...and not in a good way (is there any good way?). I wish I had put my foot down and not worn it now, but at the time I didn't want to cause waves. Sigh. Every time I see pictures I cringe.
On the other side of this issue is being too modest...okay not really, but more frumpy I guess. I have seen many ladies that swing a little too far to the other side and end up looking completely unattractive for fear they will cause a man to sin by looking too appealing. Don't get me wrong, I think we have a total obligation to our brothers in Christ. We have to help them guard their hearts, but I do think some people take that to extremes, while others completely write this responsibility off as it being "not my problem". That is not the tract that any Christian woman should take, because as Cain proved, we are our brother's keeper.
I am certainly not going to go out and buy a burka, but I have to wonder if I am being as modest as I should, or more importantly as modest as God would like.
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2 comments:
Modesty is something I personally struggle with.
Of course I believe being modest is important; however, I think the traditional conservative Christian idea of "modesty" is skewed. The idea that I can control what any man thinks, or that I'm responsible for it is wrong. I should not seek to be a stumbling block, obviously; however, I think a lot of the Christian community has lost the men's responsibility for guarding their own thoughts/actions.
To me, there just has to be a balance. For me that balance is: I shouldn't dress in a way that calls attention to sexuality (at least not publically). But seeking to be attractive and feminine is, at least in my opinion, part of the glory of being a woman.
I won't shun my God given womanhood (even the fact that I have curves--now again, not seeking to emphasize them sexually, but I certainly don't plan on wearing a sack to hide them!), instead I will seek to dress in a way that puts the focus on the whole me, not a certain body part. At the same time, if the fact that I wear pants that fit, or a dress that is flattering to my body type causes a man to lust, I believe that he is also responsible for seeking the Lord and learning to control himself.
I might sound harsh here... I don't mean to be. I believe in being modest, I just don't think that all responsibility falls on the woman. And beyond anything, I believe modesty is an attitude. Oh, and also important, AVOID BEING FRUMPY! :-)
I totally agree! It is a fine balance for women and can be so easily skewed. I think there is a huge difference between dressing in a way that flatters what God has blessed us with, and flaunting it. Does that make sense? It’s late here : )
I think you are right too, that too many women think it is their sole responsibility to try and control what men think.
Your definition of balance is totally right in my opinion. I think we should fully enjoy being a woman and all that goes along with it. It is an honor and we should treat it like one.
What a good way to put it “instead I will seek to dress in a way that puts the focus on the whole me, not a certain body part”!!
You don’t sound harsh at all! I couldn’t agree more! Frumpy is definitely to be avoided at all costs!! :)
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