The Flaw of The Matter

Dita Von Teese mentioned (yes, her again) in an interview recently that women shouldn’t share their insecurities about their bodies with their men. The idea is that we should keep our thoughts on our physical “flaws” to ourselves. The quote was, “Yes, I have lots [flaws]…But I'm not going to point out my flaws, because then they'll be more noticeable. The world would be a better place if women kept their insecurities to themselves. I say, 'Accept them, live with them'.”

Do men find such lack of confidence attractive? Or would they find a woman, that was more confident (i.e. kept her insecurities to herself) more attractive? No man that I know wants to hear the whining, and to be frank I get tired of my own mental whining. I can’t imagine someone else being subjected to it. lol

Most of my guy friends have mentioned that confidence in a woman is very attractive. I am sure that is not true of all men, but probably most. We live in a time where there is so much focus on physical beauty, really to the exclusion of character. Shouldn’t a woman have both? And I don’t mean we all have to be gorgeous or wear a mass of makeup and dress sexy. I mean a woman that takes care of herself inside and out. Shouldn’t that be the goal? To be the “whole package” if you will. I am NOT talking about getting hair extensions and plastic surgery. I am talking about working with what you have and treating it with the respect that God’s Temple deserves. Showing a care for being appropriately dressed and above all exuding the Holy Spirit in character. I only have to look to Song of Solomon to see that beauty has a place.

So, I think I tend to agree with Dita. There are way too many cartoons and jokes about the eternal question, “do I look fat in this?”, for there not to be some truth in men just not wanting to hear about our supposed flaws. He might not even see it as a flaw at all…until you tell him.

Song of Solomon 4:1-4

Behold, you are fair, my love!

"Behold, you are fair! You have dove’s eyes behind your veil.  Your hair is like a flock of goats, Going down from Mount Gilead.  Your teeth are like a flock of shorn sheep Which have come up from the washing, Every one of which bears twins, And none is barren among them.  Your lips are like a strand of scarlet, And your mouth is lovely.  Your temples behind your veil Are like a piece of pomegranate.  Your neck is like the tower of David, Built for an armory..."

 

DISCLAIMER: I feel I should restate for the record that while I enjoy Ms. Von Teese style (off the stage) and some her insights into style, femininity and such, I do NOT agree with her chosen profession. It’s tawdry, and there is no way around that. Just wanted to make that clear, so there’s no confusion.